¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My dream vacation

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-16 165

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My dream vacation is trip go to the Southeast Asia.
Usually vacation season, I have been Southeast Asia country for travel with my best friend.
2 years ago, I went Malaysia kotakinabalu.
It it my best memory of best.
I can't forget beautiful sea view and most best thing is take a rest in hotel.
Just in hotel, but it's different feeling at Korea.
I don't know reason, anyway my dream vacation is go to the trip other country.
My favorite places is Southeast Asia.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

Countries here in Southeast Asia are the best. The tourist spots are exquisite! I hope you can go here in the Philippines again. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

My dream vacation is trip go to the Southeast Asia.
>> CORRECT

Usually vacation season, I have been Southeast Asia country for travel with my best friend.
>> Usually I go to countries in the Southeast Asia with my bestfriend during vacation season. 

2 years ago, I went Malaysia kotakinabalu.
>> 2 years ago, I went to Kotakinabalu, Malaysia .

It it my best memory of best.
>>It is the best memory that I have. 

I can't forget beautiful sea view and most best thing is take a rest in hotel.
>> I can't forget the beautiful view of the sea and the best part is  resting in the hotel.. 

Just in hotel, but it's different feeling at Korea.
>> It may be just in a hotel but it has a different feeling compared to the ones in South kroea. 

I don't know reason, anyway my dream vacation is go to the trip other country.
>> I don't know the reason and still, my dream vacation is to go on a trip in another country.

My favorite places is Southeast Asia.
>> My favorite places are in Southeast Asia.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114512 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 1
114511 Why is greeting important? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 1
114510 Funeral Sermon 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 89
114509 Funeral Sermon 2 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 107
114508 Funeral Sermon 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 104
114507 Why is English fluency significant for you? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 356
114506 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 1964
114505 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 118
114504 12/3 , 12/6 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 436
114503 What is more important to take care of : mental health or... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 157
114502 Why do adults collect children\'s stuff like hello kitty or some... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 139
114501 What do you like to shop for the most? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 0
114500 Sometimes:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 109
114499 How would you describe a healthy diet? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 2
114498 12.06 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 0
114497 I like him!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 124
114496 essay about\"If you could be invisible for a day what would you... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 118
114495 I want to travel if I have a lot of money. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 129
114494 What are the elements of a perfect vacation? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 3
114493 Who makes you laugh? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 630

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04