¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think of single adults adopting kids?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2021-12-14 799

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that both single adults and orphans are suffering from loneliness, and need someone to love them. So families made up of these lonely people can comfort each other by forming a family. I think the more people who don't have a family to rely on, the bigger their loneliness can grow and become various complaints toward society. And It can be another social problems that we tackle down. In this respect, government should try to reduce the number of lonely people in society.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve! Thank you for answering your homework. However, you have to work more on sentence construction.

- Debbie

I think that both single adults and orphans are suffering from loneliness, and need someone to love them. 
>> I think that both single adults and orphans are suffering from loneliness and need someone to love them

So families made up of these lonely people can comfort each other by forming a family.
>> Therefore, they comfort each other by forming a family. 

I think the more people who don't have a family to rely on, the bigger their loneliness can grow and become various complaints toward society.
>> I think when people don't have families to rely on, their loneliness can grow and become menaces to society.
 
And It can be another social problems that we tackle down. 
>> It can be another social problem that needs to be tackled by governments.

In this respect, government should try to reduce the number of lonely people in society.
>> In this respect, governments should try to reduce the number of lonely people.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114454 hi, Jasmin ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114453 Essy2 ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114452 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 115
114451 Ending my day. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114450 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 148
114449 The country I will never visit:Afghanistan ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 109
114448 Do you make a wish when you see a falling star? Why or why not? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114447 What aspect of your health do you want to improve on? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114446 Do you agree or disagree, \"Children should always obey their... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114445 Describe a time when your work was criticized? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 173
114444 How do you control your emotions in you profession? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 1
114443 Who is your favorite BTS member? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 2
114442 Why is our company interesting to you? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 159
114441 TALK ABOUT YOUR CITY AND WHY IT IS A BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO VISIT. ¼º*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 467
114440 What¡¯s the biggest lesson you¡¯ve learned from a mistake... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 411
114439 If you could have one superpower, what would it be? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 163
114438 Annual lantern festival lights up downtown Seoul À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 0
114437 What is your first impression of your teacher? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-05 197
114436 What are the different methods of advertising? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-04 5
114435 Is restaurant food better than home-cooked food? Why do you say... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-04 599

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04