¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How has technology changed your life?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ye*nhi
2021-12-03 117

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I can say that technology brings numerous outstanding advantages to me such as making my lives safer, more secure, more comfortable. Everything can be done at the tip of the fingertips. Information can be transmitted via the Internet with ease. It allows friends and family overseas to stay connected and I can communicate on the move. The internet is invaluable when it comes to research. However, It also has a lot of disadvantages such as I can become overly dependent on technology. Spending an excessive amount of time engaging in ¡°screen-time¡± activities can cause my eyes to become nearsighted.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Very well said, Yen Nhi!
You have explained your ideas well~
Keep it up!

- T. Rina

1. I can say that technology brings numerous outstanding advantages to me such as making my lives safer, more secure, more comfortable. 
>> I can say that technology brings numerous outstanding advantages to me such as making my life safer, more secure, more comfortable. 

2. Everything can be done at the tip of the fingertips. 
>> Everything can be done at the tip of our fingers.

3. Information can be transmitted via the Internet with ease. 
>> CORRECT!

4. It allows friends and family overseas to stay connected and I can communicate on the move. 
>> CORRECT!

5. The internet is invaluable when it comes to research. 
>> CORRECT!

6. However, It also has a lot of disadvantages such as I can become overly dependent on technology. 
>> CORRECT!

7. Spending an excessive amount of time engaging in ¡°screen-time¡± activities can cause my eyes to become nearsighted.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114139 THANK YOU Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 133
114138 Return to normal could stop wiht rise in serious COVID19 cases À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 1
114137 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 2
114136 If you had money to spare, what would you buy or invest in?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 154
114135 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 112
114134 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 130
114133 Why should/shouldn\'t we have hobbies? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 135
114132 I\'ll give Ramen to them ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 98
114131 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 117
114130 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 146
114129 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 314
114128 As we grow older, we need to have more time for recreation and... ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 132
114127 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 2
114126 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 162
114125 Falling stars ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 117
114124 What¡¯s the best way to pass job interviews? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 154
114123 If you had money to spare, what would you buy or invest in?... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 0
114122 Obeying Your parents ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 108
114121 What do you think is the best city in South Korea? Explain why. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 0
114120 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-24 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04