¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you had money to spare, what would you buy or invest in? Explain why.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-11-24 157

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I have money to spare, I want to invest in South Korea science.
Of course many people are investing to a lot of kinds of science parts.
But most people are investing in the science parts about industry.
They think investing to a pure science is dangerous because we don't know that it will make a benefit to us or a damage.
But I think a pure science has to be developed for our future, so I wnat to invest in South Korea pure science.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

Wow, that's very critical of you to think of. Your answer is very reasonable. Your country would benefit a lot from you if so. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If I have money to spare, I want to invest in South Korea science.
>>If I have money to spare, I want to invest in South Korea's modern science.

Of course many people are investing to a lot of kinds of science parts.
>>  Of course a lot of people are already investing on it. 

But most people are investing in the science parts about industry.
>> But most of them are only investing the industry part of Science. 

They think investing to a pure science is dangerous because we don't know that it will make a benefit to us or a damage.
>> They think that investing on pure Science is dangerous because there is no assurance whether is it going to be a success or not. 

But I think a pure science has to be developed for our future, so I wnat to invest in South Korea pure science.
>>But I think a pure science has to be developed for our future that's why I want to invest on it. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114194 Tell me about the most beautiful place in Korea. ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 0
114193 I love to buy clothes:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 98
114192 Can cosmetics boost the self esteem of a woman? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 0
114191 Why I like to going in the birthday party. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 399
114190 Why I like stars ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 603
114189 How I take care my senses of organs ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 131
114188 Why cleaning wardrobe is important ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 130
114187 What my classroom like ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 403
114186 11.24 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 0
114185 11.23 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 0
114184 11.22 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 0
114183 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 198
114182 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 1
114181 Essay ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 133
114180 Do you read any English newspapers? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 144
114179 Current President. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 2
114178 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 140
114177 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 574
114176 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 947
114175 The answer is my colleague ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-25 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04