¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Korean creature named Hatae.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-11-13 159

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The most popular Korean creature is named Hatae. It's a creature that protect Seoul and keep judgement. So it is very good creature to Korean. And it appearance is lion+turtle. lastly, there are lots of Hatae in North-east Asia, but there is only good Hatae in Korea.
(Movie diary) I watched movie called AK-47, that is about very famous rifle called AK-47. So, I will explain about it.
This rifle is from Russia. It was second AR around the world. Maker of this gun thought about strong, and fast rate of fire. It is called AR. The first AR is stg44, it was an very big evolution. Whole world needed this AR. So in Russia, the AR called AK-47 was adapted. It was very durable and good rate of fire. And it was very cheap, so lots of poor terrorist used it. Because of these reasons, about 44890000 people were died because of this guns. So this is very historic guns.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel!  Your homework is well-organized and easy to understand. Good job! However, focus on subject-verb agreement please.

- Teacher Debbie

The most popular Korean creature is named Hatae. 
>> This is a good sentence.

It's a creature that protect Seoul and keep judgement.
>> It's the creature that protects Seoul and gives judgement.

So it is very good creature to Korean.
>> Therefore, it is very good to Koreans.

 And it appearance is lion+turtle. 
>> It looks like a lion and a turtle.

lastly, there are lots of Hatae in North-east Asia, but there is only good Hatae in Korea.
>> Lastly, there are lots of hataes in Northeast Asia, but there is only good Hatae in Korea.


Movie Diary

I watched movie called AK-47, that is about very famous rifle called AK-47. 
>> I watched a movie called AK-47. It is about a very famous rifle called AK-47.

So, I will explain about it.
>> I will write about it.

This rifle is from Russia.
>> This is a good sentence.

 It was second AR around the world. 
>> It was the second AR around the world.

Maker of this gun thought about strong, and fast rate of fire. 
>> The maker of this gun thought about powerful and fast-fire-rate guns.

It is called AR. 
>> They called them AR.

The first AR is stg44, it was an very big evolution. 
>> The first AR was StG44. It was a very big evolution.

Whole world needed this AR. 
>> The whole world needed this AR.

So in Russia, the AR called AK-47 was adapted.
>> Therefore, in Russia, the AR was called AK-47.

 It was very durable and good rate of fire. 
>> It was very durable and has a good fire rate.

And it was very cheap, so lots of poor terrorist used it. 
>> Moreover, it was very cheap, so lots of poor terrorists used it.

Because of these reasons, about 44890000 people were died because of this guns.
>> Because of these reasons, about 448,900,00 people died.

So this is very historic guns
>>  Therefore, this is a very dangerous gun.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113605 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 192
113604 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 155
113603 What would your life be like without your mobile telephone? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 1
113602 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 118
113601 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 157
113600 Why I like a children\'s day. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 182
113599 Why is it hard to stop a vice? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 126
113598 Sales Person À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 472
113597 How do you feel after exercising? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 224
113596 Hire Employees À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 449
113595 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 1000
113594 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 420
113593 What are working conditions like in your country? Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 144
113592 How would you describe the difference between a vice and an... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 194
113591 How often do you eat chicken? Do you think chicken is healthy? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 286
113590 Where does most of South Korea\\\'s GDP come from? ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 2
113589 What website do you often use and why? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 694
113588 My favorite website ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 143
113587 If you could change anything in your life, what would it be? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 1
113586 What website do you often use and why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 159

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04